LET’S HAVE A SIT DOWN! #1
I’m going to try a little experiment which may become a regular feature on my blog if it is successful enough and I can continue to amass the material. The aim is to bring two actors together in conversation using only dialogue from characters that they have played.
The two actors I’ve chosen to get this little experiment going have actually already shared the screen together. We were first treated to this with the coffee shop scene in Heat. That’s right, it’s the legendary Robert DeNiro and Al Pacino engaging in a little fighting talk…
(Warning: if you are sensitive of ear and easily offended then don’t read on as this conversation will contain quite a lot of profanities.)
DeNiro: You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? Then who the hell else are you talking… you talking to me? Well I’m the only one here. Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?…
Pacino: You know what? Fuck you! How about that?
DeNiro: It’s not necessary to lay a foul tongue on me my friend. I could get upset. Things could get out of hand. Then in self defense, I could do something to you that you would not like, right here.
Pacino: Oh what a big man you are! Hey, let me buy you a pack of gum. I’ll show you how to chew it.
DeNiro: I fuck you right where you breathe, because I don’t give two shits about you or nobody else.
Pacino: You wanna fuck with me? Okay. You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my little friend!
DeNiro: … if you make one more move on me, you motherfucker, I’ll fuckin’ cut your fuckin’ balls off and shove ’em up your fuckin’ ass. I’ll fuckin’ bury you! I’m gonna stick ice picks in your eyes and send ’em to your family so they can eat them for dessert!
Pacino: Why don’t you try stickin’ your head up your ass? See if it fits.
DeNiro: You wanna play games? All right, I’ll play your fucking games.
Pacino: Who the fuck are you?… What, you think you like me? You ain’t like me motherfucker, you a punk. I’ve been with made people, connected people. Who’ve you been with? Chain snatching, jive-ass, maricon motherfuckers. Why don’t you get out of here and go snatch a purse.
DeNiro: I ain’t no white trash piece of shit. I’m better than you… I can out-learn you. I can out-read you. I can out-think you. And I can out-philosophize you. And I’m gonna outlast you. You think a couple whacks to my guts is gonna get me down? It’s gonna take a hell of a lot more than that… to prove you’re better than me!
Pacino: You think you’re big time? You gonna fuckin’ die – big time.
DeNiro: What is the fuckin’ matter with you? What – what is the fuckin matter with you? What are you, stupid or what?
Pacino: …All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don’t break them for no one. Do you understand?
DeNiro: I can feel the juices rushing back to my balls as we speak.
June 7, 2012 at 11:41 am
Very entertaining, hope you’ll do more of them! The whoo-aah at the end immediately makes me think of the Hollywood Babble-on podcast
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June 7, 2012 at 11:48 am
Cheers Nostra. I may do a few more and see if they pick up. I’m not aware of the Hollywood babble-on. What is that?
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June 7, 2012 at 12:36 pm
It is a podcast done by Kevin Smith and Ralph Garman about the entertainment industry which usually is pretty funny (and very explicit). One I listen to each week and Garman does impressions of a lot of people, Pacino being one of them, he always does the whoo-aahh π
You can check it out here: http://smodcast.com/channels/hollywood-babble-on/ (usually NSFW because of the language and some images)
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June 7, 2012 at 12:46 pm
Nice one Nostra. I’ll have a listen to that when I get a chance.
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June 7, 2012 at 12:39 pm
This may be the awesomest post ever. LOL
The fun part is playing “Name that movie” with quotes that are essentially 90% profanity. LOL
GREAT idea. I had a lot of fun reading it. π
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June 7, 2012 at 12:44 pm
Lol. Thanks Fogs! I had a lot of fun doing it. I was tempted to keep going but it was getting harder as I went on. It was just an experiment to see it could be coherent and I think it is. I’ll think of some more for the future. Cheers!
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June 7, 2012 at 12:52 pm
Awesome. I imagine it took quite a bit of time and effort to put this together. You must have a fantastic memory for lines to know where to find them!
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June 7, 2012 at 12:57 pm
Thanks Jessica. If truth be told, some where from memory and others came from the IMDB. Its sometimes a useful and handy little tool to have at your disposal.
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June 7, 2012 at 12:58 pm
Hahaha amazing! PLEASE let this be a regular feature
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June 7, 2012 at 2:11 pm
Haha. Cheers Andy. I would love it to continue but the problem I’ll eventually face is the dialogue drying up and it’ll be difficult to have two actors sit down and discuss a particular topic. For example, DeNiro and Pacino would find it difficult to have a philosophical discussion or anything that didn’t contain profanity. I’ll have a think on what actors could be suited together for another though.
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June 7, 2012 at 2:31 pm
HAHAH Very very funny, although I reckon you are making a rod for your own back with this feature. In that I bet it is a fricker to get going.
I wish I had thought of it!! π
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June 7, 2012 at 2:36 pm
Cheers Scott. Glad you enjoyed it. I think you’re right. As Fogs said to me on twitter, this one will be hard to beat. I’ve a couple of other actors in mind but with with Pacino and DeNiro playing so many well known characters, it’ll be harder for anyone to compete. Nicholson gets a lot of good lines though, so he’s a definite for the next one.
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June 7, 2012 at 2:48 pm
I’m expecting you to do a Stallone/Schwarzenegger one! π
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June 7, 2012 at 3:00 pm
Nice suggestion man. I’ll keep that in mind. The next one is definitely Nicholson, as I’ve already got some material but I will look into that.
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June 7, 2012 at 5:27 pm
Great idea, though I appreciate the warning about profanity, I’m a bit sensitive on that front. Still it’s entertaining, Mark, I hope you do more of these! Maybe do one with two Scottish actors in the future? You know what I’m getting at π
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June 7, 2012 at 6:20 pm
Cheers Ruth. You were one of the people I had in mind when I put the profanity warning in π I realise that’s not too everyone’s tastes. It is going to be a lot harder to do more but you never know, a Butler/McAvoy sit down may happen in the future.
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June 8, 2012 at 4:48 pm
Awesome!! I know it’s funny that I have sensitive ear in regards to foul language but yet I LOVE the Scots. Butler almost always swear in interviews, much to the dismay of his mum (by his own admittance). Are you gonna do the female version of this ‘sit down’ conversation too? π
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June 8, 2012 at 5:39 pm
Swearing is a big part of the Scottish language. For most people hear it’s every other word. Lol.
I’m working on another just now (that’s also quite profane) but it’s time consuming. Unfortunately, no female one yet but I do have at least one actress in mind for a future one. I just need to find her a suitable partner. Watch this space.
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June 7, 2012 at 7:49 pm
Brilliant Mark, a bit of a departure for you but a fantastic idea, i love it. I will look forward to the next instalment. Do a superhero one perhaps. Bales batman v Downey’s Iron Man.
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June 7, 2012 at 8:11 pm
Cheers man! It is a bit of a departure but I thought I’d like to add a little something different, other than reviews. I’ve been doing a bit of further research and I have to admit, it’s really hard. The dialogue isn’t as juicy as DeNiro and Pacino’s. Another one, may take some time.
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June 7, 2012 at 8:24 pm
Perhaps do it weekly, i dunno may become a regular feature in the blogging world. DeNiro and Pacino’s chat is certainly juicy!
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June 7, 2012 at 8:36 pm
I’d love it to become a regular feature but weekly might be a bit of a push. It is quite time consuming. For now, I’m just working it all out and trying to match up people. I’ve been told I may never better this one and I think I agree. Shit! Lol.
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June 7, 2012 at 9:08 pm
Very cool man! It’s definitely going to be hard to top this one but there are definitely some great characters out there that I’d love to see have a conversation with each other!
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June 7, 2012 at 10:48 pm
Thanks man. It will indeed be hard to top but as you say, I’m going to concentrate on iconic characters and actors and try and come up with more. Even if they’re not as good, it’ll still be fun to assemble.
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June 7, 2012 at 9:27 pm
Hilarious. I don’t know half the movies, but the quotes flow together very well into one profanity-laden conversation.
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June 7, 2012 at 10:50 pm
Glad you enjoyed it Morgan. In some ways, this was the scene I’d like to have seen between DeNiro and Pacino when they shared their first time onscreen. Heat’s ending would have been all the more intense for it. Lol.
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June 7, 2012 at 11:04 pm
Whoa, that is a LOT of profanity. But impressive. Would you mind telling me which film each line’s from? I know the first one with De Niro is from Taxi Driver (1976), which I haven’t seen, but that line’s so famous I’d be surprised if there’s a film fan on this Earth who doesn’t recognize it. After that line, I didn’t recognize any.
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June 7, 2012 at 11:28 pm
The clue to each film is in the photograph above the line of dialogue. For example, it starts with Taxi Driver, then Scarface, Cape Fear and so on. Some film’s, as you’ll see, are used more than once.
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June 10, 2012 at 11:28 am
Oh, all right. Thanks, haha.
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June 10, 2012 at 1:41 pm
If your still struggling with the photos, I could give you a list of the film’s if you’d prefer.?
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June 8, 2012 at 7:09 pm
[…] together quotes from their various movies into one profanity-laden argument, in the debut of his Let’s Have a Sit Down feature. Very well done, and very […]
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June 8, 2012 at 11:52 pm
Haha, this is genius! Love it! Hope the feature stays π
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June 9, 2012 at 11:10 am
Thanks Fernando. It’ll stay as long as I can keep going. I’ve another one in the pipeline just now, which I think will work.
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June 9, 2012 at 6:23 pm
I’ll look forward to it π
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June 10, 2012 at 10:53 am
Mark, that was bloody hilarious, good job. That was very entertaining to read.
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June 10, 2012 at 1:40 pm
Cheers Chris. There will be another one soon.
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June 12, 2012 at 3:50 am
Haha this is pretty awesome! Glad I happened to stumble upon your blog (from Flixchatter, I think). Would love to see a sequel to this. π
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June 12, 2012 at 7:06 am
Thanks for stopping by Eric. Yeah, I’m hoping to continue these “sit down’s”. I’m working on another just now. Should be finished within the week.
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June 13, 2012 at 4:02 am
You had me at “quite a lot of profanities” I like the idea of this feature, also the first time I have seen someone do something quite like this. I give this feature a big fuck yeah!
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June 13, 2012 at 10:06 am
Show me the profanities! Lol. Cheers Adam. I’ve got another that just requires some editing. It might not be as well recieved but further feedback will be required.
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June 16, 2012 at 5:25 pm
This is awesome! Very original.
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June 16, 2012 at 8:23 pm
Thank you! And thanks for stopping by. There will be more of these in the near future.
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August 6, 2012 at 5:14 pm
Excellent work here, sir!
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August 6, 2012 at 5:23 pm
Thanks man. This was the experimental one just see if it would work. Folks seemed to like it so I ventured on to do more elaborate ones. I may go back one day and flesh out a more substantial DeNiro and Pacino one though.
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August 6, 2012 at 5:34 pm
I love it – this is such a cool idea! Whoever mentioned a Stallone / Schwarz is on to something – that could be hilarious. Good stuff amigo ~
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August 6, 2012 at 5:38 pm
As it turns out, Stallone and Schwarzenegger is the one I’m working on just now. But the context in which they speak will will not be what people will be expecting. It’s going to be pretty outrageous and maybe even offensive to some.
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August 6, 2012 at 5:46 pm
Sounds perfect to me.
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August 6, 2012 at 5:58 pm
Haha. Watch this space.
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August 24, 2012 at 9:04 pm
[…] beforehand as a lot of profanity is included.Β Episode#1 – Robert DeNiro & Al Pacino. https://mrmarakai.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/lets-have-a-sit-down-1/ Episode#2 – Jack Nicholson & Samuel L. Jackson. […]
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March 16, 2013 at 12:29 am
Hilarious!!!
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March 16, 2013 at 12:41 am
π
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